For as long as I can remember, I have been a good historian when it comes to significant life events. These are events that have changed me into the person I am today. Some examples...the loss of loved ones, the day I met the love of my life (Mark), my first TEC weekend, the kindness of strangers reaching out to me, the day I met Danielle, the births of my nephews, the day I got engaged, my wedding day, the day I found out I was pregnant with Madeline, the day I delivered her, the day I found out I was pregnant with Grace, the day I found out I would lose her, my birthday and Sarah's birthday...the day we welcomed and said goodbye to Grace.
On February 26th 2009, we went to the Doctor for a routine ultrasound. We were going to find out the sex of our baby, see her and hear her heart beat. We did all of those things. We found out we were having another beautiful baby girl. We saw her and we heard her heart beat. That day, our worst fears were also confirmed...Our baby had severe brain abnormalities, and severe facial deformities. We were going to lose our baby.
For four days we waited anxiously for an appointment with a specialist who was to comfirm or discount the findings seen at our initial appointment. On Monday, March 2 (my Birthday), we ( Mark, Marni and myself) sat in an ultrasound room to see the 3D images of our baby. She was perfect...she was our baby...but she wasn't developed as we had hoped and prayed. Her life line was the umbilical cord through me. The doctor discussed all of our options. We made the heartbreaking decision to have an early induction. We went to the hospital to beging the induction at 6pm. Grace was delivered at 8:59a.m. Tuesday, March 3 (Sarah's Birthday). She weighed 5 ounces, and was 8 inches long...
She was named Grace because she was conceived by the Grace of God. She lived in me by the Grace of God. And, she was brought into this world to change my life, again, by the Grace of God.
I never thought this would happen to me. As a friend said, I am now a member of a club that no woman should ever have to join. I am sad. I am broken. I am brokenhearted. I am devastated. I am hopeful. I am grateful.
I have a beautiful little girl who is my light, my smile, my reason. I have an amazing husband who is the love of my life, my best friend and my strength. Please join me in my journey as it is one more change in my life...
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